would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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