I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize