I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
