Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
