Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
We just shotgunned beers for America
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
