thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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