what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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