Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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