We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
