Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize