Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
