Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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