3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
