Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
