dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
