it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
