He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize