this beer tastes like vomit already
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
