I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
do herpes really smell.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
