While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
