Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
