Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
