i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
