i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
