I got chris browned last night
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
