i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
