Need sex. Gaining weight.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
