I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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