Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
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