Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
