hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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