In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
