perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
