Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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