I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Say something about gay babies.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
