so explain again why im purple
no
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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