I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize