i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
