Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
