I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize