ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize