I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
