new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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