what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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