i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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