love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
