This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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