Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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