she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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