If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
