That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
try to milk me bitch
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize