Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
